Notes from class.

WHY HEAVEN IS THE STARTING POINT FOR UNDERSTANDING NIGHT & DAY DEVOTION

A. The Center of All Things

1. God's Existence

• In the revelation of Scripture God Himself is the ultimate center of all things. He dwells in the glorious solitude of self-existence and compared to His absolute necessity all things are feeble and frail-a vapor that appears and vanishes; grass that withers away in a moment.
• From the smallest insect to the most brilliant man, all are on a level plane in that they hang dangling over the abyss of non-existence, upheld only by His sovereign word. This in and of itself requires a profound shift in our thinkng because we tend to view the world, our lives, and everything in between myopically and egocentrically.
• In truth His identity is the unshakable rock of certitude with which all must reckon and find their orientation. This radical, all-encompassing centrality in all things means that only by throwing ourselves into Him and moving outward can we discern the truth about anything.

2. Contingency & Reality

• The consequence of this truth is that the further a creature drifts from the will of God, the less real they become. "Real" here doesn't denot any metaphysical qualities but simply that the greater the discord from God's commandment and design, the less relevant they are in the ultimate sense.
• This is due to the fact that only God has meaning in and of Himself because His existence alone is essential. Consequently any significance creation possesses is a bestowed or derivative signigicance and not inherent to them.
• In other words, the importance of someone or something hinges solely upon its relation to the Creator of All.
• This requires quite a shift in our thinking because we typically do not view the world from this perspective. Though the political, economic, and military leaders of the earth appear to be so influential, in God's eyes they are but a vapor that appears for a moment and then vanish.

With whom did He take counsel, and who instructed Him, and taught Him in the path of justice? Who taught Him knowledge, and showed Him the way of understanding? Behold, the nations are as a drop in a bucket, and are counted as the small dust on the scales; Look, He lifts up the isles as a very little thing...It is He who sits above the circle of the earth, and its inhabitants are like grasshoppers, Who stretches out the heavens like a curtain, and spreads them out like a tent to dwell in. He brings the princes to nothing; He makes the judges of the earth useless. Scarcely shall they be planted, Scarcely shall they be sown, Scarcely shall their stock take root in the earth, when He will also blow on them, and they will wither, and the whirlwind will take them away like stubble. "To whom then will you liken Me, or to whom shall I be equal?" says the Holy One. - Isaiah 40:14-15,22-25

Partner with Him!

Thousands of years ago, the prophet Isaiah saw a vision of a worldwide worship movement in the last days whose extent reached into the remotest and most difficult-to-reach places (Isaiah 42:10-13). He saw the islands of the earth lifting up their voice in song to the Lord. He saw the coastal regions declaring the name and glory of God to the nations. He witnessed the dry desert places and nomadic peoples exulting in their Lord. He caught a glimpse of the Arabian peninsula singing a new song to Jesus. Even the tops of the mountains (think: Nepal and Tibet) would shout to God and declare His praise throughout the earth.

But how will this happen? How will Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu, and pagan peoples turn to the one true and living God and lift their voices in worship to our Lord Jesus Christ?

We believe that the day of western missionaries is not over with. Over 100 years ago, God raised up the Student Volunteer Movement out of the West where 20,000 young adults abandoned their pursuit of the so-called “American Dream” and were ignited to proclaim the Gospel in foreign lands and give themselves to “the evangelization of the world in this generation.” Today, God is again raising up the best and the brightest in this generation to reach the hardest and darkest places so that the Lamb who was slain may receive the reward of His suffering.

To that end, the Antioch Center for Training and Sending (ACTS) is a training program designed to equip a new generation of cross-cultural intercessory missionaries to plant worship-based prayer furnaces in the hardest and darkest places of the earth. ACTS is a convergence of prayer and missions equipping a new generation to finish the task of world evangelization, disciple the nations, and pray back the King.

A lot of you know me, and you know I have always been a person of faith. I have wanted so much to move God's heart, even at a young age. This is why I sing. This is why I try. I look back and I can clearly see that little girl from a small village in Alaska crying out to worship her Jesus. I truly believed that He was MY Jesus. I still believe it. I thank Jesus for putting this desire in my heart. I know this was all for his glory, he was preparing me for the work that was set before me. I have joy in knowing that He is calling me to the nations. He is putting me in a place where I am learning to seek him out for every need. During this season of my life at ACTS he is providing. And I trust Him for all of my needs. But now I know that he is grooming me to walk in the ways of his kingdom. And in this kingdom we are interdependent.

I am raising 2,500.00 for my plain ticket and vaccinations for my mission trip to Thailand. I need these funds by tomorrow. I know this is so last minute. And they are willing to work with me until the end of the month.

I desire to worship God where he is recieving none. I know he is worthy of it.

I am going to Thailand to build a house of prayer, do door to door evangelism, and to see that He recieves the Glory due his name.

I want to invite you to be a part of it. I want to invite you to see souls brought into the kingdom and minds renewed and revelation spread to hill tribes in Thailand. I want to thank you all for your love. I want to thank you for your support in the past. I only ask that you do what you feel lead to do, even if that's $10 or $100.

Thank you.

August in Kansas City

It is already the middle of August everyone! that means I've been in Kansas City for one month. This has been a very busy program, we have classes every day and our day usually ends at about 9 PM (See My Valuable Time post). The Lord has been really moving upon my heart, even in my weakness I believe he is there. He has been speaking to me about myself. A lot of times people talk about "self-discovery" and they take extended trips to buddhist temples, to masques in muslim countries, or they simply take drugs. I was speaking to the Lord and told him that I don't want to walk a path of self discovery. I just want to walk on the path of truth. Alanna doesn't belong to herself. The life she livesshe now lives in Jesus Christ. I pray that I would awaken to that truth more and more. It's never by might nor by power. I can't be interesting enough, I could never have enough influence or strength to change myself, and I can't change any region, person, country with these either. All things are His and everything is in existence for His pleasure. He is the only one who can do any kind of change. But to him it's not really change at all. It's restoration. He gets to restore the broken things and all the stuff that looks lost. He gives beauty for ashes. And I get to partner with Him. I get to be his friend and watch Him do justice, watch him display his beauty. It's awesome.

And I finally have photos to share!
These were taken by a guy in my group named Peter Telian :) I love his camera!

This is some of the students from ACTS, were having an awesome time in worship in this photo.

Me and my Korean friend Victoria having a devotional afternoon. She can really pray!

Kansas City lightning, it lights up the sky. And it is SO LOUD! One evening all the girls woke up because of the loud sounds.

Helping my friend Kate from New Zealand order a smoothie, she seems to be having a hard time deciding.

My valuable TIME!

ACTS Schedule

Week 5: Theology of Night and Day Worship

7AM- Breakfast

7:30AM- Morning Devotionals
8:00AM- Prayer Room
9:00AM- Prayer Room
10:00AM- Prayer Room
11:00AM- Prayer Room
Noon- Lunch
1:00PM- Core Class with Stephan Venable for this week
2:00PM- in core class
3:00PM- in core class
4:00PM- Small Groups
5:00PM- Dinner
6:00PM- 9:00 PM: Homework, Study Groups, Drive Home.
10:00- Curfew
11:00- Lights Out

This is a typical Monday Schedule....it's not as packed as the rest of the week. On Tuesdays we have Harp + Bowl Clinic in that 6PM-9PM block, we also use that time on Wednesdays to have e-12 groups (where we study eschatology together), and Thursdays we have Support Raising Training.

All to His Glory!

"I ask no more, in good or ill, but union with Thy perfect will."- Madame Jeanne Guyon (1648-1717)

I'm sitting here reading an incredible story about the human heart. I would love to have a bigger capacity for loving God. Just being in his presence so much here has caused me to cry out, GOD LET ME LOVE YOU MORE! I don't know what that looks like! Let me love you more!

Guyon was a french woman who lived a full life in God. When she was only 15 she married a man 20 years older than her (I guess that was acceptable back then). Her mother-in-law was abusive to her as she grew in the Lord...she didn't really care, she saw her afflictions as God making her inwardly holy and full of life. After her husband died she grew more and more into the inner life. She increasingly believed that the Christian life consisted not of rules, regulations, and rituals, but of the life of Christ in the soul of a human being.

When she was 34 she began her ministry, traveling throughout France and Switzerland teaching wherever God would lead her. During this time she also wrote to many people, counseling them and leading them gently in the way of the inner life. As Guyon's teachings became more popular and widespread, church leaders began to charge her with heresy because some of her teachings were different than church doctrine.The Roman church taught that any relationship with God and Christ had to be through the rituals and sacraments of the church, but she taught that each person could directly communicate with God in her inner being, and that was best done by laying aside the rituals and religious activities of the church and living the contemplative life.

In the end, the church found her and put her in prison where she spent up to 14 years in prison and even survived the Bastille (which was primarily used to house political prisoners).

Her testimony is just amazing. It was said that she was persecuted by her church "because she loved Jesus too much."

What a way to live your life! She truly decreased more and more in a time when she could have increased. Because of her beauty she was married to a rich man. But that wasn't enough for her. She had a cry in her heart that could not be satisfied by this world. I want a faith like this. Willing to lay aside the "perfect" future for the sake of "loving Jesus too much", I feel like Jesus already put this in me, a beautiful desire to fully know him, he placed a map in my heart that points exactly to his heart. I'm excited to see what God will do in this season of my life. I'm excited to know there's women out there like Guyon, I hope I become more and more like her.

The Bridegroom left to prepare a place for US!

I am here in Kansas City, it has almost been one week and the weather has been very hot. And it's very humid as well. The Lord is good though, every building I have been in has air conditioning...so I am doing very well transitioning from Alaska. This time has been so lifechanging, these past few days have brought so much good news into my life and I've also came to learn more about Jesus' heart which is just amazing. At the beginning of the week I felt like just another girl who happened to show up here. But God has been speaking to me through all of these messages, this is no accident and His desires are for me to recieve more during this season. I have been asking God for his heart for the nations. I want to be filled with compassion even more for those in the unreached parts of the world. There is just so much to learn and so much to do. It's a bit overwhelming, but I feel God in my small moments of prayer and when I am speaking with him alone. He has had desires for my life that I am just learning about while I am here. He has a plans that go far beyond my small vision and plans. There is no doubt that this is where I am supposed to be at this time.


The first few days were a time of consecration. These days were so precious to me. I know that I can't rely on my feelings and sometimes I want to, but when I pray I feel so close to Jesus' heart, it's been so easy to speak with him. We have a very busy schedule and a whole lot to think about at the end of each day, I try to pray alone every day, just to get some time with Jesus during those times. And its been good. I just pray that all that I am learning will really drop into my spirit and set me aflame for the nations. I do have a desire to go to the nations, I just want my zeal to be stirred up because I know that Jesus is carrying a great zeal for the nations. The world is ready and I want to be too.


Leaving home for the first time has been pretty difficult. I haven't gotten homesick yet, but just not being in Alaska trips me out sometimes. I feel like I have gotten grace to get through this first week here in Kansas City, especially with the hot climate. My room mates are pretty awesome too. I have two roommates from Michigan and China. These two amazing women have really been given to me by God for this time. They are so encouraging and I am fascinated by their lifestyles and their desires to pursue God is evident in all that they do. It's been so encouraging. And a good boost.


All in all...we are preparing for something new. All 30 of us.


The Antioch Center for Training and Sending is going to change my life.


I can feel it.

Call him Dexter.

Sitting in the living room in the middle of this week. My mom just decided to name her puppy Dexter. He's a cute little thing, I think about 3 months old. I'm sitting here kind of going back in my mind what it is I must have accomplished these past two weeks. Without a job right now I have so much more time to pray and think. I remember when I was without a job in '09, I felt terrible not working but at the same time I always found something to do. Then it went the other way in 2010, I had a full time job that took up almost my whole day which left me struggling to pray or even think about the things that matter. The Bible says not to get weighed down by this world, to stay in the spirit as a child of God. I want to get to a place where I can balance out my time, have a special place to meet with Jesus (I do now, on my walks. I think I need an actual prayer closet or a prayer room though), or just have a set of brand new spiritual ears that constantly hear what the Spirit is saying. Because, that would be fun. And definately worth my time. And I would probably have so much more accomplished in life than just working, eating, studying, trying, and even worrying. God has something greater than those things. Like in Luke 10:

38 Now it happened as they went that He entered a certain village; and a certain woman named Martha welcomed Him into her house. 39 And she had a sister called Mary, who also sat at Jesus’ feet and heard His word. 40 But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, “Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me.” 41 And Jesus answered and said to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. 42 But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her.”


What a way to put it!


Life can be so troubling, and Jesus says it doesn't have to be. I want to choose that good part every day. Mary makes it look simple. And it must be. Just sit with Jesus. Listen and hear His words. But I think it would be cool to actually see him and see him express himself now that would be cool. To go back in time. I have thought about that a lot...anyway. I'm getting off track.

So my priority is to choose the good part every day. With or without a job. And to stop worrying and troubling myself.