G. K. Chesterton:

When we are very young children we don't need fairy tales: we only need tales. Mere life is interesting enough. A child of seven is excited by being told that Tommy opened a door and saw a dragon. But a child of three is exicted by being told that Tommy opened a door. Boys like romantic tales; but babies like realistic tales — because they find them romantic. . . . This proves that even nursery tales only echo an almost pre-natal leap of interest and amazement. These tales say that apples are golden only to refresh the forgotten moment when we found that they were green. They make rivers run with wine only to make us remember, for one wild moment, that they run with water.

The Process

Transitioning from Thailand: What did I learn about God?

I don't know where to start. There were so many different angles of my heart that had been changed by this trip. Writing about what I've learned (I believe) will help these things settle in my heart. So I'm going to post these experiences in different posts for the next few weeks.  I'll just start with my first experience (according to my journal).

Upon arriving to Thailand I had so many different questions. I had personal and even corporate questions. Before leavign Kansas City I wanted to know so much. It got to the point to where all I could pray was, "What do you think about me God?", after praying this in the Global Prayer Room the Lord gave me a vision of his heart for me.

We were driving in a car and He was behind the wheel. I couldn't see him but I knew he was there. And in the passenger seet was a little cardboard box that was painted yellow with red hearts on it. I remember that clearly because I made that when I was in elementary school! the Lord was showing me my small creation! something I had made while my motor skills were still developing!

He was showing me that he cares about every movement of my heart and he is so intimately connected to my life, even more than I can even imagine. He wanted me to see that he was the one driving, and has always been the one directing my life (in other words: Be still and know that I am God). And he honours me, he loves what I do, he loves how I create and how I look up to him and simply gaze at my dad in heaven. I believe that in this vision, this short vision,  all my questions were answered. I do care about what I do. My creativity is probably one of the most important things about me, or at least that's one part of me that when it's wounded becomes the biggest pain ever.

Just the fact that he was driving and I was sitting safely gave me so much comfort. I felt like we could be in a ten hour car ride and I was safe to say anything I wanted and enjoy spending quiet moments as well. After this I all of a sudden began asking my Father all kinds of questions. I wanted to know what he thought about that painted card board box! I wanted to know what he thought about a lot of things. I could see clearly that he is a father. All of a sudden it was natural. There were no more doubts. He is my dad.

What did you learn about you?

Well, that is a very good question. I somehow always have to settle down and get in touch with what is exactly happening with me sometimes. I literally have to stop what I'm doing, take my journal and a tea (music helps too) and sit in a quiet place.

 For the past three years my life has been so busy and full of different engagements. In Thailand, and for the first time in a long time I felt a grace to journal, to pray, to still my heart and all the traffic that comes with it. In Thailand, I experienced a season of knowing myself better. I realized that my charachter and personality can be used to tune into God more easily.

 What I learned about Alanna is that she is a well spring that needs to be taken care of and needs to be given time to reflect on her seasons and her life. I realized that I can starve my own heart by the words I say and the things that I think about. It was an amazing time of falling in love with the man Jesus. I wanted to know his personality and the big question for these three months was: "What do you think about me Jesus?" To hear his thoughts about me cleared away self-doubts, and even the desire to please others.

I'm blessed with the best communicator who ever lived. The Holy Spirit who tells me about Jesus, and is willing to tell me all kinds of things.

What did you learn about cross-cultural missions?

I found that roses and thorns come with cross-cultural missions. This photo was taken on Ptarmigan Hill outside of my village of Minto. it shows some of the flats that surround our small town. I grew up in a very cold place, Alaska. And after spending those three months overseas I began to feel so blessed by where I grew up. Before leaving to Kansas City I told the Lord how much I didn't like to travel. I don't like airports. I don't like hot climates.

 It's like food. I have a different taste pallette than most of the world's population. We up here in Alaska are a tiny percentage. So being in Thailand was challenging mainly due to the heat. It was so humid as well. I realized that cross-cultural missions for me is always going to come with a thorn from now on. But I decided early that this will never stop me from cross-cultural missions.

After settling into the city of Chiang Mai, I realized that I looked very Thai! I found out right away that the Thai are very social people. And if they think your Thai, it's not hard for THEM to start conversations. But once I looked at them and simply said, "No Thai." They would look so stunned that I wasn't! I had a lot of people unknowingly try to speak to me in Thai. As an evangelist, this is the greatest treasure. To have others speak to you is like having an open door! I don't know if this is only for Thailand, but I do think how I look will prove useful no matter where I go.

 I also realized that cross-cultural missions gets you directly in touch with who you really are. There's no way around it. There's a language barrier,  major cultural differences, and even food and climate differences can help all sorts of weaker things boil up. Cross-cultural missions are no joke, and Jesus himself calls us to them. It wasn't fun at times, it's hard when you don't know the language, and it taught me to totally depend on God every single day.

In Thailand,  everywhere I looked I began to realize more and more that all of creations points to God. I never sat under a waterfall before in my life. In Thailand I did. There are different conversations that I will never forget and people who will always be in my heart. I feel like my heart enlarged and my eyes became wide open. I left with a nation seriously knitted to my little heart.

2012, you are intense

New Year's Eve 2011:

 This year was off to an adventurous start on the Alaska Highway. We were driving in my dad's truck, his new GMC, and left Anchorage a little bit later than we expected. My mom, her friend Dorcas Bloom, my older brother Timothy and younger brother Nelson were all prepared to make it home to ring in the new year. The drive was very long, and the weather is always warm around the Matsu area leaving Anchorage.



That was until we drove into Healy. The temperatures read -40 outside. Our truck seemed to react by shaking, our peaceful roadtrip all of a sudden became pretty intense. So me, Dorcas, and my mom began praying. We prayed into the small city of Nenana, if you watch the movie Balto you'll hear it mentioned a couple times. Might be in a Jack London book, it's a pretty famous Alaskan town. So, my brother Tim pulls the truck into a Chevron gas station and we look inside and it was closed.

 We pull out of there and made our way to the community hall (still praying). It was getting a little cold in the truck by this time, the heater was beginning to blow cold air. The building just became empty, we caught the tail end of the New Years celebration. My mom spoke to a middle-aged man and was just beginning to tell him our car trouble, when she realized he kind of looked like her brother-in law Howard (who is a mechanic). This man didn't know anything about cars, he kept repeating this too. So she thought, "I need to call Howard." the young man left so my younger brother Nelson called his friend from Nenana and they decided that we go to the O'Brien's house (yup, we Alaskans stick together).

 In that same moment my mom was on her phone with uncle Howard and he told us that we need to put Heet into the fuel line right now or else the entire engine will cease (because our fuel was literally freezing). So both of them get off of their cell phones and give us the next step which was, "Were going to the O'Brien's" and, "We need to get Heet, now." so we all get back into the truck (which was super cold by then) and park outside the O'Brien's. I don't know how to describe the warm fireplace we met inside their house. Now I grew up with a fireplace and I've got a lot of great, warm memories. But this fireplace is now in my top 5 fireplace moments ever. When its 40 below outside, these things take on a whole different feel and meaning. It was so comforting, I believe even to my bones! Matt O'Brien sat with us in his living room at about 1 am telling us awesome stories about the power of prayer and how God protected his meat from animals when he would go hunting. It was a short visit and he did have an extra bottle of Heet, a real answer to our prayers.

 

 We sat there for about an hour and it was just an awesome time. The Lord really orchestrated it all. We got in the truck in freezing temperatures and settled in for the 45 minute drive to Fairbanks. We all were quiet when the heater began blowing hot air and the truck ran as normal. We went for 15 minutes and then began to praise God for his guidance! And for answering our prayers! Such an exciting New Year!

A FEW LESSONS I'LL CARRY INTO 2012:

• As this year unfolds, keep learning through your circumstances.
• Have humility! Help could come from anybody, anywhere!
• Make detailed observations.
• Don't harden your heart, keep a heart of flesh in prayer!